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WHAT IS YOUR ADVICE? Two born again Christians got married,
A marriage built on lies was built on a shaky foundation and it was bound to break one day. The man should not have lied, it was absolutely unnecessary and now the woman feels like she doesn’t know who she married. They need to both go for counseling after the woman has calmed down, because she needs a break from all this to think. As Christians there is no option for divorce so the woman should pray to God to give her the wisdom to handle the situation, the husband needs to self reflect, I don’t think he’s truly born again, living your life on lies is not Christ like, he needs to give his life to Christ properly and work tediously to win the love and trust of his wife again, the children are innocent in all of this. Hopefully they will work it out by the grace of God.
It’s a tricky situation when you haven’t experienced it yourself. The man probably did not want the woman to know because he was so scared of loosing such an amazing woman (probably in all ramifications she is good to him). I do understand that a relationship built on lies has repercussions but it’s also good to see things from both angles before giving a final verdict. My opinion will be for the woman to make the final decision and pray to God for guidance. Even Jesus Christ forgave sins that weren’t yet committed by man or also sin committed by man on the cross that are way worse than this. They need the guidance and love of God in this case more than ever.
Powerful
Hello, I agree with most of your response except that” there’s no option for divorce “. I disagree with you totally on that and I believe it’s a dangerous message from the pulpit which has contributed to many injuries, and deaths of violently abused women in their marriages. A woman that is violently assaulted and abused in a marriage has the right to be protected and saved from the perpetrator of the crime. Thanks
Hello sis, I completely understand and agree with you. However I made my Judgment based on this particular case alone. I am absolutely against abuse and violence in marriages I do not stand for it in any way! Hope you understand this. Thanks.
A difficult decision to make. First of all the man is not born again, if he was, he would let his wife know about his past that can bring up a quarrel in future, if she is okay with it, she can go ahead with the union but if not, she will find her way.
She is already in the marriage bounded by God, she should try and forgive her husband and let God fight her battle for her.
SHALLOM
We keep saying the man is not born again but that’s judgemental. As children of God we shouldn’t work with assumptions. We don’t know what must have been going on in his mind. Being born again doesn’t mean you are spiritually capable of handling everything. You must grow and study in the word (search more for God diligently) to attain a higher level. Even high reputable men of God in our society today have divorced or done worse than this man. Will you say that the men of God preaching on the pulpit are not born again?
This case is more of the physical flesh taking charge than the spirit. This is why we need to always dwell in the presence of God just like David did. And if you observe, it was when David left the presence of God, sin overcame him. Forgiveness is the key here. The man need to be remorseful and truly sorry and show his woman he would be the best he can be. It’s not easy but I think the woman should try to forgive him but if she can’t that’s understandable.
Nice take, very insightful! Thanks.
This is a difficult situation to navigate. It’s very unfortunate that he just wasn’t truthful in the beginning but he continued to maintain the lie. They’re both going to have to talk it out, and vent their feelings about the situation. The man is going to have to own this, hold himself responsible and accountable for the situation he created for his wife and apologize to her. The woman is going to have to deal with her emotions, and find it in her heart to either forgive the man or not. This is going to be difficult for her because she now realizes that she’s the one without a child of her own and no longer both of them. Counseling may be a thing here as well, because a lot of damage has occurred and a lot to deal with. The situation is sticky but I see the storm becoming calm if handled appropriately 🙏🏾
Cut long to short Amen
She need to seek God first , that men if he is a reborn Christian he should not do this mistake (lies, cheat ).they both need counseling. Amen